Death of a Burden
As I have been going though my current transition I have noticed an interesting pattern.
While going though the emotional journey of loss, I have attempted to cognitively process those very emotions. I have noticed a parallel to what is known as The Five Stages of Grief.
In her 1969 book, On Death and Dying, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduces the idea that there are five stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance/Resignation.
Full-time ministry provides a unique environment where the work circle, the social circle and the worship circle are identical. When there is a loss of the work circle, it has a direct impact on the other circles. The loss of a ministry role results in the loss of relationships and also results in a loss of a church home.
The process is very similar to the five stages of grief.
Going through the loss of both the ministry role and the associated relationships has been painful. But like the winter, it precedes the new life of spring.
Looking back on the last few weeks, I have come to a place of acceptance: I no longer have the burden for my former place of ministry. It has died. I no longer stay up at night dwelling on how to help the people grow in their faith. I no longer wake in the early morning hours burdened with the needs of he people.
God has created a opening through the process of loss. An opening that is ripe with anticipation for the next God-given burden!
David and Saul
There are many things about King David that that earned him the description: "a man after God's own heart." Remaining submissive to Saul is one of those things.
1. David was a better leader than Saul. 1 Samuel 18:7 says that the people were celebrating that David was a better leader than Saul. David had tremendous character to remain submissive to a leader who didn't have the same leadership capacity that David himself had. A reminder to all those in second-chair (or third, fourth or fifth-chair leaders) is that your leadership capacity isn't a reason to stop submitting to your leader.
2. God had removed his anointing from Saul. We read that God told Samuel that he had rejected Saul as king in 1 Samuel 16:1. Samuel went to anoint the next king. The fact that God had rejected Saul as king did not remove Saul from the position of king. It can be tempting to look at our leader and conclude that God has rejected him as leader. We can start questioning his leadership capacity and decision making ability. The fact is, God may have rejected the leader, but it is not our responsibility to replace the leader. That is still in God's hands. A friend of mine recently used a line that is appropriate: "The interaction between God and man is often mishandled."
3. Samuel had anointed David as the next king. 1 Samuel 16:13 records the time that Samuel anointed David to be king. This happened before David even entered Saul's service. One of the hardest places for an individual to be, especially when they realize they are the next leader, is the position of follower. David entered Saul's service knowing that God had rejected Saul as king and knowing that he was going to be the next king!
David was such a man of integrity. For David to remain submissive to a rejected king and to remain submissive to a king who was trying to kill him required that he was submitted to The King of kings.
Integrity
I came across the following in a periodical:
Most people make integrity synonymous with honesty, but integrity has a finer point. The root word for integrity is "integer," which implies singleness, unity, something not divided, consistency, and by extension, reliability and trustworthiness - in everything.
A person of integrity is an honest person. He does not lie, steal, cheat, or take unfair advantage of others. The true follower of Christ has little problem with these major issues. Even the best of us, however, are sometimes careless about our integrity in little things. It is important that we maintain our integrity at every level. It is the "little foxes that spoil the vines" (Song of Solomon 2:15).
The person of integrity presents the same face every time and in every situation. In contrast, a hypocrite presents a different face to different people. Even a little two-facedness violates scriptural principles and undermines our integrity. Those who observe this behavior lost the ability to trust our "face."
It would seem that consistency is as much a part of integrity as honesty is. Without honesty, integrity is impossible. Without consistency though, we can fool ourselves into thinking we are people of integrity because we are 'telling the truth' even when we tell the truth from different perspectives.
The person of integrity speaks the same message regardless of who they are speaking to.
When The Big C Hits Home
This weekend it was announced that, due to financial issues in the church, my position was being eliminated. For more than five years I've grown to love the people of this church. I have prayed for you, tried to encourage you and also to challenge you to love God and love others.
This has been an interesting past few days: first being told the news on Friday and then having the privilege of performing not one, but two weddings over the weekend.
One of the weddings is for a couple that committed their lives to the Lord at the beginning of this year. In fact, one of the relatives told me of the incredible life-change that has taken place in the groom's life since then!
I am reminded of Paul’s words to the Romans in the twelfth chapter: “… his good, pleasing and perfect will” (Rom. 12:2).
Generally speaking, none of us likes CHANGE - unless we are initiating and leading the change. (Even at that, there isn’t a guarantee.)
When change is imposed on us, we can fight it – which really results in fighting for control – or we can submit to it. I have learned to accept change, even though I do not always enjoy the process of change.
Our perspective to change means everything. I may have been serving in a particular local church body, but they have not been my master. My Master is in charge of changes and none of this has surprised him.
My Master has a plan that is “good”! It isn’t bad for you (us) and nothing could be better!
My Master has a plan that is “pleasing”! It will satisfy you (us) and provide contentment!
My Master has a plan that is “perfect”! Nothing you (we) can come up with will be better!
Yeah, I like change better when I’m in control, but it makes it easier (not easy) when I keep focused on seeing my master in control.
#4 Relator
Continuing the results of my Strengths Finder 2.0 evaluation, my fourth strength is that of "Relator."
People who are especially talented in the Relator theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.
I have a great love for working on teams. There is incredible potential when people set aside personal agendas and work toward a common goal. John Maxwell used to say that "teamwork makes the dream work." How true it is. In fact, David says in Psa 133:1 that when unity is present, everyone wins. Unity requires that individual preferences and agendas are set aside for the greater good.
To use a very popular phrase: "We are better together!"

